Ah, the good old days when you could sprawl nude on comfy tables and people thought it was "cute." Well, for me, those days are long gone. If I were to appear nude in public these days I would be rightly arrested for disrupting the narrative. Please note that I was a pre-Pampers infant. My poor mother didn't face the first world dilemma of disposable diapers versus washable cotton. It's a good thing infants are so adorable because frankly there is a smelly case to be made for infanticide.